Working Girl Again

I have officially become a working girl again.

My first few days away from Danika have proven to be much harder than I thought and once again reiterates my point that we are seldom happy in the exact moment we are in, as just last week I was complaining that I wanted a job so bad, and now I have one and am mourning the loss of my time with Danika.

So for all of you wondering, here's the scoop.

I am the Office Manager for a company called Nikki Beach Resort and Spa.
It is still in the beginning stages of development and will not be completed until 2010. It is the first 5 star resort that Central America has ever seen and will surely change the face of Roatan, as it will bring in millionaires and celebrities that would have never come here otherwise.
Anyone interested can go to www.blueoceanreef.com to see more.
It is truly an incredible project and one that I am grateful to be a part of.

I have always enjoyed watching something start from gravel and rock and grow into something incredible. I am torn about my feelings however as I feel that I have now integrated myself into the tourist/Rich American crowd versus the poor Honduran crowd I have felt so much a part of since I've been here. It saddens me to see what this will do to the class status here on the island, as the gap between rich and poor will surely sky rocket. However I know that this will also bring about many jobs where there were none, and give the economy the boost it needs for the survival of it's citizens.

This weekend I am being flown to San Pedro Sula on the main land for an ultra exclusive VIP Party attended by some of the richest people in the world. Land owners will fly in from all different countries to see the unveiling of the project and the launching of Nikki Beach in Roatan. It will be a feeding frenzy of buying and selling the property and condos, millions of dollars will be exchanged. Millions of dollars have already been spent on that one night alone. Champagne and exquisite food will flow. Models and celebrities will be present. Everyone will be dressed in all white. White Linens draped over everything. It will be elegant, it will be trendy, it will be luxurious. It will be everything that I am not....

I am to get on a private jet tomorrow morning at 6 am and will be picked up by a driver at the airport where I will be escorted to a 5 star hotel where I am staying for the night. My boss is flying in from Miami special for just the night, bringing with him a dress that he purchased for me from one of the most expensive stores in America. I will meet with billionaires, and models, and celebrities all wanting a piece of this incredible development. It will be a night I will never forget.

I find the irony of the situation overwhelming.

Never in a million and one years would this situation present itself for me in America. I was surrounded by the culture of greed, having everything I could need at my fingertips (or at least at the nearest Walmart) and yet wouldn't be able to touch that crowd of "haves". Because I was a "have not".
Now I am living in a third world country where running water is a luxury that is promised to no one, and am constantly surrounded by those same "haves" that want a piece of what I've got.

They come into my office begging to be a part of this incredible project, begging to be included in the "Nikki Beach crowd", and always leave with a strange curiousity for the girl who doesn't seem to be impressed with their designer sunglasses and summer homes in Belize. They ask me a million questions about how I got here and what businesses I own, and cant' believe that I came here following my heart not my pocket. A concept they surely will never understand.

And they unknowningly have justified the exact reason that I came here in the first place, because once you "have" you will never be satisfied again. There will always be something more. You begin to look externally for your contentment versus internally; the only place that it can truly be found.
They look at me with blank stares when I try to explain that the view is still as breathtaking from my $500 apartment as it is from their $989,000 condo.

After work I rush to the grocery store before it closes ( I work 6, sometimes 7 days a week to earn just enough money for an apartment, Danika's Nanny, and a few groceries), and fumble through my purse to find enough to buy Danika a melon for tomorrow since the market has already closed for the day. As I hand the cashier my last 500 lempiras ($30), I thank the Lord that my pockets don't run any deeper than they need to.

And let me tell you, that hard-earned melon never tasted so good.